To be successful at anything in life, the biggest influence is confidence.
There are various strategies, techniques, behaviors and practical ways of
improving your life, but if there is no foundation then you are like a house built on sand. Your foundation is made up of your values, who you are at your core, and what makes you authentically you. It takes confidence and some work to identify your values and who you are – but that's why you're reading this article.
1. Know Your Values
Personal values are at the very core of who you are. They are the building blocks and the foundation of who you are. A value is what is truly most important to you, what drives and motivates you, and what makes you authentically you.
When people leave you feeling frustrated, angry, irritated, annoyed, disappointed or betrayed, it’s usually because one or more of your values is being denied or defied. You feel underappreciated, disrespected, unheard, and unseen. The times when one or more of your values are being honored, you feel elated, loved, content, heard, and respected.
You can be confident knowing that your values make you who you are and that no matter what adversity or circumstances come your way, no one can ever take your values away from you. Once you know and become clear on your values, you will start making choices that align with your life and manifest what you truly want. The best part is it allows you to live fully as yourself.
Confidence does not come naturally and easy to anyone, it is something that takes time and practice. Like anything, you cannot expect yourself to be perfect right off the bat. You will slip up and experience moments of doubt, fear, shame, guilt, and insecurity. But over time you will see the results you want.
Just like going to the gym, it may take some time and effort before you start to see results. Until then you have to have hope and remain persistent. Our minds and bodies like to remain in a state of homeostasis; equilibrium is safe and comfortable. The issue is that if nothing changes, nothing changes. You may avoid taking risks or trying and convince yourself that 'I didn't really want it anyway'.
Not taking risks is safe and comfortable, but it also decreases confidence. I have never seen a look of confidence and pride like that of the one on my kids' faces when they tried something they were afraid of, took a risk, and succeeded! Instant confidence boost! Practice taking risks and build confidence.
Try these two tips and let me know how your confidence improves. Practice, practice, practice. And even when you feel like you lost or weren't perfect or weren't enough, get back on track and keep trying. Confidence doesn't appear overnight, it develops. Just take risks and don't give up!